I love this crazy tragic almost magic awful beautiful life!

Although some who know me seem to think I'm the most pesamistic and negative person there is, but the reality is, I'm really not.  But, I do hate to be disappointed and would rather plan for the worst and hope for the best vs. not plan at all and throw fate in the air and just hope everything falls into place.  True, it almost always works out for the best somewhow, even if it doesn't seem like it at the time, but I'm much more rational than that.  I can be spur-of-the-moment at times, but I'm a planner by nature.  It's just who I am.  If you don't like it, I'm sorry, but I can't change a core part of who I am to suit everyone else.  I realize at times I feel like I'm planning my life away.  What is that saying?  Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans.  I realize that at times it may seem like this is what I'm doing and I'm trying to let go of that somewhat, but does seem like when I let go and just let the wind take me where it may I end up in quite a mess, sometimes in more than one way, and then I have to go back and clean it up.  It's much easier for me to stick with what I know and make a plan.  It helps me sleep at night to just have a plan. 

My plan right now includes many levels, but on the surface, I just want to get to a point of happiness, being content and giving myself options.  I will elaborate more on this at a later time.  I need to ger ready to take my car in for a very needed oil change now....

Just Me

I've been considering starting a blog for quite awhile, but finally decided it was time.  And, no I haven't been thinking about it for 3 years, I have no idea why it says 2007.  It took me awhile to come up with a name so I decided to go through some of my old journal postings on another site and saw "Beautiful Diaster" and figured right now, as just about always, it fits my life rather perfectly, so Beautiful Disaster it is. 

As you will quickly find out if you stick around long enough...I AM:  30 • a mom • goofy • smart • funny • outgoing and introverted all at the same time • independant • caring • thoughtful • a lover • a best friend • dependable • always late, when I used to be always early, pre child • a sister • a daughter • in a relationship • blessed • a lip gloss addict • a planner • a lover of all things pink • sassy • tolerant • not easily entertained • a lover of high heels • sentimental • stubborn • driven • willing to do anything for my family and friends • content • forgetful • a city girl • a people watcher • addicted to text messaging • complicated • a full time employee • a student • a volunteer • likeable • random • hopeful • a couch25K participant • A Beautiful Disaster.